Tag Archives: mindset

Finish What You Start

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Do you often struggle to complete  projects/goals you if though you have every intention of finishing them? All my life I have struggled with the shiny object syndrome. At times, it got so bad, I resorted to scheduling my entire day, hour by hour , if I wanted to get anything done! Believe it or not, this is a common problem. After taking stock of myself, and trying different approaches, I discovered that luckily, you can I can follow a few steps to ensure, that we can become the type of person who finishes a project once we start it.  Let us get you set up for success!

  1. Make A Plan

The first step to finishing a task is making sure you have a plan at the beginning. It needs to be a plan which you write down. A mental note isn’t worth the piece of paper it is written on. You may want to jump in and start something in your excitement, but you might not realize all the work and challenges you will face. When you take the time to make a plan, this will better prepare you for the task at hand, and you’ll be able to spot problems much more easily.

  1. Take A Break

If you find yourself getting overly frustrated or beginning to loathe the project because you’ve been working on it for so long, it’s okay to take a short break. This break will help reset your mind and focus. You might even be able to solve some of the problems you are facing while you take this little breather. Just make sure that when you set an endpoint to your break, this way you can hold yourself to it and not just abandon the project.

  1. Make Small Goals and Rewards For Yourself

As you plan how you will conquer your task or project, break your goal into smaller mini-goals. Then, cross them off and reward yourself as you complete them. It will help keep you on task, and you’ll be able to feel as if you are making progress, even if it’s small.  This progress will do wonders to keep your spirits high while working on the project. The little rewards you are giving yourself will probably help too.

So next time you get excited about a new project or goal in your life, slow down a bit and make a plan, complete with smaller goals and rewards for yourself. Then, as you pursue the project, don’t be afraid to take small breaks if you need to recuperate. Chances are, thanks to these three steps, you will be much more likely to finish your new goal than leave it abandoned. 

To Your Success,

Juan

Develop The Growth Habit Mindset

Goals/Dreams, Gratitude, Life Lessons, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Readers,

Have you ever considered the flip-side of all that, by building a habit that’s positive? What if the habit you formed was one of growth and personal development? Having a growth mindset positively impacts your life. What are the benefits of developing a growth mindset? Why put yourself through so many cathartic changes? Below is my take:

1. You keep learning. Learning is important as you not only discover new ways to do things, but by making it a practice, you develop new ways of thinking, and ideas. Learning connects you with more of the world and helps you see things with a deeper significance than you ever thought possible. But more than that, people who stop learning, very quickly stagnate. Studies have shown that the practice of learning new things when you are older helps ward off problems related to dementia. In short, learning is good for your brain!

2. You learn perseverance. As we learn new things, we adapt and change how we think. That gives us the ability to see other solutions to problems, that would have frustrated us in the past. By challenging yourself to grow, you learn how to push through obstacles and forge new paths.

3. You embrace challenges. Growth can be challenging. But by pushing yourself, you’re able to look at challenges differently. An obstacle now becomes an opportunity to learn something new, and to do things in a way you haven’t before. 

4. You embrace failure. When you’re interested in growing as an individual, you start to see failure differently. Everything becomes a potential lesson in a way that you didn’t think would work. 

5. You become more open to criticism. By being willing to grow, you start to see that the input of other people has significance. You see their words not so much as something negative, but one you can use to develop as a person, and learn something about yourself. You might not always like the lesson, but that’s part of growing too.

By embracing personal growth, you find the best version of yourself. You have the opportunity to become more than you ever thought possible. And the best part? Finding out you can become more still, and that the furthest edges of yourself are far beyond what you thought you ever could be. 

Insanity.

Once Upon a Line, , , , , , , , , ,

…is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results” Tony Robbins. So it’s a new year, you want to change old habits and develop good ones. It’s important you understand why change is not easy. Old and bad habits are comfortable, safe, and does not require too much effort. However, if you are hoping for some insight into how to form new habits, the next few minutes is guaranteed to prepare you for change.  Think you can form a new habit in a few weeks? I used to think so too. Wrong. If you’ve been doing the same thing for decades, the truth is a bit more complicated.

The myth about behavior becoming automatic in 21 days, started when journalists misinterpreted a popular self-help book on Psycho Cybernetics back in the 1960’s. After all, you can probably eat more vegetables starting today, but complex tasks like playing the violin will take more time to stick. On the other hand, the New Year is an ideal time to begin forming constructive habits, geared towards enhancing your overall happiness and wellbeing for the rest of the year

Here are some basic strategies for habit formation. Set yourself up right now. Remember, it is okay to ease you into your new routines: 

Plan ahead. Eliminate excuses by plotting out your course in advance. If you want to wake up earlier, go to bed on time.

Be consistent. Regularity reinforces itself. Soon, it will be easier hit the gym after work, even if it’s raining, or colleagues are heading out for beer and pizza.

Spot triggers. Kicking a habit requires you to notice what happens right before you bite your nails or buy another pair of shoes. Are you bored at work or arguing with your spouse?
Develop substitutions. Once you know your cues, you can choose a different response. Take a walk or invite a friend out for coffee.

Review your reasons. Go over the reasons why you want to adopt your new behavior. For instance, remind yourself about the benefits of drinking water instead of soda.

Personalize your goals. While contemplating your why’s, visualize your future self. Focus on what you have to gain instead of just pleasing others.

What if you’re tackling something as ambitious as managing diabetes or transforming your dead-end dating history? Here are a few advanced strategies to get things going: 

Practice compassion. You’re bound to slip up occasionally. Forgive yourself, and move forward.

Team up. Enlist a friend, exchange support and encouragement. Eat lunch with a colleague who is trying to lose weight too.

Write it down. Raise your awareness by keeping a journal about your campaign to stop swearing or start flossing. Note what happens on the days you stick to your program,compared to the days when you drift back into old patterns.

Remove temptations. Eliminate the triggers that distract you from your objectives. Clear the junk food out of your kitchen, or the cigarettes out of your car.

Design obstacles. Make it difficult to give in to your old tendencies. Leave your credit cards at home to prevent impulsive shopping sprees.

Go on vacation. Leave home for a while. If you can afford one, vacations are an ideal time to forge new habits,  you can make a fresh start in different surroundings. 

Make time to sit down to meditate each morning. instead of becoming caught up in searching for lost socks or checking your email.

Make daily exercise (and parallel parking:) so easy you won’t even have to think about them. Positive habits make advantageous choices automatic so you’ll stick with them. You’ll also have more energy to devote to other challenges.

I hope you found these suggestions helpful. Feel free to share this post with your network.

You Your Success,

Juan

Distraction-free zone

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I had every intention of posting much earlier than today. As a person of color living in NYC, as you can imagine, recent events surrounding the death of George Flloyd in MN, USA,  have captivated our attention. I needed time to step back, reflect, and decide what is next. I know you are bombarded from news all over the world already, but let me just say this, if you have supported the cause and movement in any way, THANK YOU. Now onto my WFH series!

One thing you have to master when you work from home is minimizing distractions. Household chores, TV, social media, and kids are some of the big ones. So, how exactly should you deal with these distractions to ensure you can work more efficiently? Below, you’ll discover some great tips. I hope you find them useful.

Turn distractions into rewards.
Distractions don’t have to be a bad thing. They can be used to reward yourself after completing work tasks. For example, if you love nothing more than to curl up in front of the TV watching your favorite shows, allow yourself the opportunity to watch something after completing a big project. Similarly, you could use social media in the same way. Once you’ve completed a task off your to-do list, reward yourself with a short period of time on your social media channels. Using distractions as a reward can help to keep you stay focused, and boost your motivation to get your work done.

Consider working in various parts of the home
It’s common to set aside just one place to work from. However, did you know you may find it more productive to work in various areas of the home? It’s all about adding variety into your new working environment. Some days, the spare room may be the best place to get work done. Other times, you may find it more beneficial to work on the dining room table, or in the back yard. Don’t limit yourself to where you can work, mix it up, and watch your productivity levels increase.

Add a little background music
This tip might not be useful to everyone, but many professionals claim working with background music, can limit their distractions. You’ll want to focus on calming music, rather than something that makes you want to sing along. Alternatively, listening to podcasts and audiobooks in the background can also work well. So, if you struggle with productivity, try adding a little background noise and see if it makes a difference.

Check emails sparingly
Checking emails is important when you work from home. However, it can also take up a lot of time. Try to limit how many times you check them during the day. Ideally, first thing in the morning, then after you’ve completed each task you’re working on. Some adjustment is required, depending on the type of work project.

Turn off notifications
Finally, a great tip is to turn off those notifications. Social media, news, and app notifications can prove really distracting when you’re working from home. It’s not always easy limiting distractions when you work from home, but it can be done, and with practice, it will become a norm for you.

Until the next post,
Best,
Juan

Dealing With Anxiety In Turbulent Times

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Dear Readers,
How are you keeping during these turbulent times?! Parents with children being homeschooled, it’s even more difficult to balance work and home life. My followers diagnosed with PTSD, Depression, Anxiety, etc, have you found it even more difficult to combat the triggers of your mental illness? Many of you are divorced, separated, with no children at home, how do you spend your time? There are so many questions!

Yes, these are very uncertain times. Uncertainty rules the day, and the unknown is more distressing than anything else. Two months ago, our lives changed, dramatically. I live in NYC, the epicenter of COVID-19 in the United States. I was stunned by the level of death and destruction around me. After experiencing multiple symptoms for almost a month, I was finally able to get tested. Negative! I am fortunate, I know, and I hope the result is true. I was told to “power through my symptoms” some of which still persist today.

Three of my clients were directly impacted by COVID; one lost a mother, another a cousin, and the other was hospitalized for several days. I currently work at home, so for the past month, I have been putting out several fires, which is mostly the reason for my absence here. NYC is made up of strong, tough people.  The 9/11 terrorist attacks, Hurricane Sandy, multiple airplane crashes, etc has not weakened the resolve to keep fighting.  I expect us all to come through on the other side. Hundreds continue to die every day, but, the situation has stabilized; field hospitals being taken down, the NAVY Comfort has left, hospitalization rates have decreased, and we are finally “flattening the curve”. 

Six out of seven continents have been affected by COVID-19. Besides the normal day to day hustle, and immense stress of daily living, we now have a pandemic to contend with. Today’s post will hopefully provide support on the panic affecting so many. Anxiety is not necessarily a new phenomenon, however, with all that is happening, it will only exacerbate the issue. We are so connected through the internet, social media, and other outlets, not only are we exposed to the issues in our immediate communities but across the entire globe. Furthermore, with so many working from home, or in some cases, those working on the frontlines, we are expected to juggle growing responsibilities simultaneously and remain productive. Anxiety varies in intensity and frequency, please use the following suggestions, and resources to improve your overall quality of life.

Live In The Moment
The only point in time in which you will EVER exist is right now. Ironically, most of us dedicate the bulk of our mental energy to the past or future. Anxiety often tricks us into replaying past mistakes in our heads over and over and worry about things that have not happened yet. A big part of dealing with anxiety is to live in the moment. This means focusing all of your physical and mental energy on what is going on right now. Not only does this simplify life, but it also allows you to get the most out of your limited time. Trying to deal with your entire past and future on a constant basis makes it virtually impossible to appreciate what is right in front of you. Over the years, Mindfulness and Meditation have helped to turn things around for me and completely changed my life. First I had to know who I am. Pick up a copy of this book Discover My Life’s Purpose. Doing so helped me to remain focused on the present moment. I was no longer worried about where I stood in comparison to others. My path was my own, and it did not matter if others agreed. they don’t have to! Learn how to. You too can learn how to  Enhance Your Life With Mindfulness.

Control What You Can Control
The truth is, many of the issues causing anxiety in your life are beyond your control. This includes global and community issues, as well as problems in your personal life. What you need to realize is that the weight of the world is NOT on your shoulders, even though it can certainly so at times. Anxiety tells you to worry about solving problems that are out of your hands. In reality, focusing on the issues that you actually have the ability to resolve is a much healthier response. Awareness is the key to conquering fear created by the ego, which leads to anxiety. Once you’re aware of how your ego is creating fear and anxiety, then you can observe it, and learn to shape it. You have the power to stop the fear in your mind. It’s important to remember that all the negative scenarios in your head don’t have to happen in real life. They can stay as imaginary issues. They may never materialize or cause you heartache. You can control how you respond to challenges.
Yes, we are tired of Netflix and Chill, homeschooling, puzzles, and games, but there is so much more you can do, being stuck indoors. Learn how to create a family website, make a family movie, coding, create a film festival, go on a virtual field trip, etc. Take a look at this invaluable list I put together, with direct resource links in Ultimate Guide To Indoor Fun

It’s Okay To Not Feel Okay
Another side effect of anxiety is a feeling of isolation and loneliness. People experiencing anxiety on a routine basis, often believe they are the only ones dealing with the issue. Everyone else is much happier, and no one will accept us if they knew the extent of our anxiety. It is so important to realize, this is far from the truth. Everyone around you is experiencing some degree of anxiety and fear of the future. You are far from alone. Don’t feel like you have to go through life acting as if everything is okay when it isn’t. Recognize the feelings, accept them, embrace, and challenge them. Maya Angelou said ” We are more alike, than we are different”

Get Help If You Need It
Finally, if your anxiety is something you are having trouble dealing with on your own, then don’t! There is absolutely nothing wrong with seeking professional help. Ironically, our society welcomes getting help for even minor ailments but shuns the same approach for serious mental issues. Consider this, if you had Pneumonia or another physical illness, you would seek the appropriate doctor for care. Why would you not do the same, if you are suffering from mental health issues, such as anxiety? There is help out there, get it if you need it! I have been blown away by the more than 100k medical and mental health professionals, who came to the aid of New Yorkers!

We can and will get through this. We are better together.

Until Next Week,
Best,
Juan

Staying Positive In Tough Times

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Most of us can agree positive thinking is important. It tends to make us feel better, be more productive and reduces stress. The problem is, our lives aren’t always rosy. Crises happen – be it on a personal level or something more widespread. That reality is a part of everyone’s life, and it makes keeping your spirits up tough.
If you are struggling to stay positive and hopeful when going through these or any other tough times, try these tips:

Don’t Put Your Head in the Sand
No matter what you are dealing with, ignoring it is rarely the answer. While ignoring problems might feel good in the short-term, it will sap your long-term positivity. Plus, many of the other tips listed here require you to acknowledge your circumstances first.
This Too Shall Pass
When you are in the midst of a crisis, it is nearly impossible to keep things in perspective. That said, you need to recognize your circumstances are temporary. Things might seem dire at the moment, but try your best to remember that “this too shall pass.”
Make a Plan
One of the single best things you can do to maintain positivity during tough times is to make a plan on how to deal with it. When you focus on the solution rather than the problem, you will naturally feel more positive. You will feel like you are rising to the challenge.
What are You Grateful For?
Even during great personal turmoil, there is always something to be grateful for. When things get tough, it is vital to remember there is good in the world, and more importantly, in your life. When you are struggling, take some time to list the things you have going for you!
Reach Out for Support
Support in and support out! Reach out to loved ones and offer your support. Reach out if you need assistance too. When things are dire, it is always reaffirming when people pull together and help each other.
Take a Break
Sometimes our circumstances are so dire that we are forced to think about our problems constantly. It is OK to take a break. You can take a break from the news, social media, or other people. It might not be easy but taking a break from external stimuli can help keep you positive.
Journal Your Feelings
Journaling is a powerful tool in so many ways. By simply giving you a place to express your fears and concerns, a journal helps you maintain positivity outside of its pages. Do you know how good it feels to vent to a friend? Well, consider your journal as your best friend.
Focus on Things You Can Control
When your world seems like it is spinning out of control, you may feel helpless. One way to address this and stay more positive is to focus on the things you can control. Do what you can with what you have.
Embrace Distractions
Distractions are usually the worst. We are often trying to learn how to avoid or deal with them. They aren’t that bad when you are struggling to stay positive in tough times, though. No matter how silly they seem, you should embrace distractions that bring you joy in tumultuous times.

ACTIONABLE STEPS

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Write down your feelings. Think about everything you are dealing with and how it’s affecting you and write that down. Don’t worry about grammar or spelling; just focus on getting your feelings out of your head and onto paper.

Reach out. Whether you are reaching out to offer support or request it, reaching out will help you feel like part of a community. When we all work together, we can overcome anything.

Make a plan. Think about what your biggest struggle is right now and devise a plan to tackle it. Set some goals and deadlines. You will feel more positive by just having the plan, and even more positive if you act on it.

Until the next post,
Best,
Juan

Changing Habits

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Now that we have a working knowledge about SMART goals, it’s time to focus on the baby steps to meeting your goals.  Some people lose weight through intermittent fasting and adopting new diets. Others try to make such major changes, but they start missing their afternoon candy bar or go-to snacks. Pretty soon, they revert to old habits and wind up gaining back the pounds they lost and more.
If you’re tired of watching your weight fluctuate, you may need a more gradual approach. Little changes add up, until you see a big difference on your bathroom scale. In fact, minor adjustments are often more sustainable because they suit your lifestyle. See how easy it can be to slim down, starting with these simple things to incorporate into your diet and workouts.

Small Eating Habits That Help You Lose Weight

  1. Cook more. Preparing your own food allows you to control the ingredients. Restaurant meals tend to have more calories, salt, and sugar. That’s true whether you’re eating at a fast-food outlet or a fancy bistro.
  2. Plan your meals. Write out a menu for your daily meals and snacks. You’ll be able to tell at a glance if you’re getting all your required nutrients, and you’ll probably eat less.
  3. Stock your kitchen. Keep healthy snacks on hand, along with staples for light meals. You can make room for good things by getting rid of junk food.
  4. Increase your fiber. Some studies suggest that eating more fiber is the single most significant change you can make in your diet. The top sources include split peas, lentils, and black beans.
  5. Boost your protein. Foods rich in protein fill you up and recharge your metabolism. Plus, your body has to burn more calories to digest them, compared to carbohydrates and fats. Include some protein in each meal and snack.
  6. Eat breakfast. Refueling in the morning helps to prevent excessive eating later in the day. Start out with something hearty and nutritious, like Greek yogurt with berries and nuts or a bean burrito.
  7. Control portions. Forbidden foods can become so tantalizing that they lure you off your diet. Reduce your serving sizes so you can enjoy your favorite treats without any guilt.
  8. Focus on whole foods. Make vegetables, fruits, and other natural foods the core of your diet. Cutting back on packaged items will eliminate the most empty calories.
  9. Drink water. Quench your thirst with plain water and tea, instead of beverages loaded with calories. Staying hydrated facilitates digestion.
  10. Be mindful. Slow down and pay attention to what you’re putting on your plate. Your food will be more enjoyable. You will likely notice when you’re full instead of continuing to eat more than you planned.

Small Workout Habits That Help You Lose Weight

  1. Be consistent. A successful exercise plan is one that you can stick to. Select preferred activities, and invite a friend to join you. Aim for at least 250 minutes of moderate-intensity exercise a week if you’re trying to lose weight. That translates into about 35 minutes each day.
  2. Build muscle. Increasing your muscle mass enables you to burn more calories even when you’re at rest. Lift weights or do squats, and pushups with your body weight.
  3. Move your whole body. Speaking of squats and pushups, devote most of your workout sessions to exercises that target your whole body. They’ll burn more calories than smaller movements like bicep curls.
  4. Train in intervals. High-intensity interval training pays off. Alternate between brief bursts of intense activity and even briefer rest periods. For example, run for a few minutes while you’re taking a walk.

Eat healthier one small step at a time. You can shed weight without disrupting your life or feeling deprived. 

Until the next post,
Next,
Juan

 

 

Show Me The Money!

Once Upon a Line, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Where is Your Money Going?
At the end of each month, do you find yourself wondering where all your hard-earned money went? Discovering your financial drains will enable your money to work for you. Funding savings, debt repayment, or other things that are important to you instead of just disappearing into nothingness. A little detective work might be necessary, to figure out where your money is going. The best way to get a handle on your finances is to get everything accounted for, then tackle your financial goals.
How can we identify our money drains and improve our financial outlook? Consider the following tips:

  1. Calculate all income. The first thing to do is calculate all sources of income for your household. Put together a chart listing income sources and amounts for the past 30 days. This will give you an idea of how much money is coming into the household, which is the first step to determining, how much is going out.
  2. List your expenses. List all of your regular monthly expenses such as rent or house payments, car payments, credit card and loan payments, gas, food, utilities, cable, internet and others. Try to list exact numbers, or estimate if your expenses vary. This will give you a good idea of what your basic expenses are.
  3. Track every penny. Spend an entire month tracking every cent that you spend. Write down your beginning balance, and every dollar in and every dollar out. This is the key to determining where you’re losing money.
  4. Interpret the results. Compare how much money you’re bringing in, to how much you’re spending every month on bills, and other expenses. Are you spending beyond your means? Are you allocating money for savings, investments, and retirement?
  • If you have money drains, determine what they are. Are you spending $4.00 on an iced latte Monday through Friday? Is your dining out expenses much higher than you expected? Are you eating from vending machines or expensive fast-food joints at lunch, rather than brown-bagging it?
    5. Put this information to good use. Armed with your written guide (below) to your income and expenses, you can control your finances more effectively. Once you have this information laid out in front of you, it will allow you to fine-tune your finances little by little, until you’re putting more money into savings and less into “money drains” from month to month.
  • Determine ways to reduce these money drains. Can you brew coffee at home to save money every week? Can you cook at home to save money on eating out? A few dollars saved every month in different areas of your budget can definitely add up to your benefit.

Once you determine how much money you have coming in and going out, start directing your money toward what’s really important. Trim down your expenses or find ways to increase your income. Do not spend beyond your means. Your financial future will shine much brighter when you prepare for the future you desire. Use this free Budgeting-A-New-You-Workbook to help you get started!

Next week, look out for simple ways to take back more of your time.

Until the next post,

Best,

Juan